Monday, June 11, 2007
blogebrity & christenings of several types ~ welcome!
so a big fattie thanks are in order to mrb for getting me prepped to stop basking in my 'i'm such a loser and not doing anything viable for the world at large' whining and actually start taking action. the other night we discussed various feminist issues and websites to which he frequents, as well as his new blog. it's going great, sir! i adore the fact that the biggest feminist i know is a tall, heterosexual, middle class, white male (in no particular order.) *grin* i need an outlet as well. and while i don't really care either way whether or not people read this, i do need to get it all out. maybe for self-justification, maybe to stroke my ego, but definitely to keep me (perhaps?!) a little more sane.
and so, this morning, at work, instead of actually getting shit done (as i should also be doing now, lol,) i went to feministing to check out what the blogebrity (my newly created word of the day!) jessica valenti had to report. and is there a hot plate today! the article in question , is one that i had no idea people felt so strongly about. silly me!
i was truly unaware that women are being required to jump through so many hoops about taking or not taking a surname. i really don't believe that my name should be in legal question, decided by the courts. if one partner wants to take the other's name, or combine them somehow, or keep their birth names, who cares?!? names are a very personal thing, and individuals have every right, just as they have the right to choose first names, to keep or discard them at will. signing paperwork and making things official should not be more or less depending on your gender.
the idea here is to GIVE PEOPLE THEIR OWN RIGHT TO CHOOSE. the commentary on valenti's relatively short post astounded me. i was amazed at the amount of people getting so touchy about being expected to side permanently either way. (ie to change or not to change)
here's how i see it:
if you tell women they should change their names out of respect to their spouse, that's not right. similarly, if you tell women they should keep their names out of respect to themselves, that's not right either. decisions are personal. and although they affect us all, they must be made. it's your RIGHT to choose whatever name you would like. and you shouldn't be made to go through extra bullshit or criticized, whichever way you lean, to make that decision, as long as it's not expressly hurting yourself or anyone else.
(how's that for the definition of liberal , lol.)
and just because i REALLY need to get back to work, i won't even start on the fact that as a queer woman, i don't even quite factor into this debate, as i don't even receive the right (thanks, dear government) to marry and worry about taking (or not taking/adjusting) my surname.